Living each day much muchier
We forget that the sweetest joys are found in the simplest acts: hugs, laughter, quiet observation, basic movements, holding hands, pleasant music, shared stories, a listening ear, an unhurried visit, and selfless service.
Richelle E. Goodrich
Bewildered as he might be, sometimes a man’s highest calling
is simply to stand, and hug.
I’ve written before about friendships as romances. Some moments of connection are precious; the heart is alight and content.
The world is a beautiful place because that very person is there with you. They’re irrevocably part of your soul. However, they’re not your partner or lover and will never be.
Romantic friendships are not a new thing. In fact, they’re a very old-world thing that fell out of fashion when our culture decided sexual relationships were penultimate love.
The simple acts of holding hands, cuddling for connection and reclining on one another has become fraught with connotation. So we keep them between romantic couples or for the innocence of children, leaving single people touch-starved.
Touch-starvation is a very real thing for otherwise healthy adults. You feel disconnected, lonely and shy. You can even seem awkward and creepy when the natural balance of connection has been absent too long in your life.
As a dancer, I’m in the company of huggy people almost every day. We laugh, we flirt, we move together. Yet it’s not quite the same. It’s never as nourishing as the purposeful touch of people I’m fond of and the deep satisfaction that comes from the warmth of their hugs.
I feel blessed to now have a few friends that I can cuddle randomly without reason or apology, link arms with, hold hands or rest my head in a moment of affection. Women find this easier but there are even a few men whom I’ll happily stroll with, hand in hand, down the street.
People might look on and make assumptions but what does it matter? I’ll probably never date them, for one reason or another, but that doesn’t mean we can’t forge a connection and find comfort.
We all belong to one another. We belong in ways that we’ve lost the language and rituals to demonstrate.
Let’s start a hug revolution.