Living each day much muchier
Learn to ask, “How would I handle this situation were I the person I hope to become?”
It’s amazing how powerful internal messages can be. Last night at dance class, I stuffed up a move I’ve done perfectly well countless times … but I did it in front of the whole class while the instructor was demonstrating something with me. Suddenly, my internal dialogue shifted from ‘I do this well and I love it’ to ‘I’m no good at this’ and I struggled for the rest of the lesson. When I imagine that I’m a great dancer, everything comes naturally. When I think like a beginner, I fail… massively.
I don’t believe in the laws of attraction made popular by The Secret and other new age dialogues. I do think you live up to the expectation you have of yourself. If you think you’re a generous person, you’ll act generously. If you think of yourself as awkward around the opposite sex, you surely will be. It works in advance of the fact too. If you believe you’re charming, that belief will lead the way and shape your behaviour until it becomes an integral part of who you are.
Earlier this week, a work colleague gave me paper on appreciative inquiry, an idea similar to this used in workplace change. If you focus on fixing problems, you’ll only get mired in them. If you focus on doing more of what already works, you develop a positive outlook that’s based on an existing track record and that inspires you to keep improving.
So today, instead of thinking ‘if I was smart/good looking/healthy etc then I would do x’ … what would you do right now if you were already that person?