Goodbye fiction
What makes us discontented with our condition is the absurdly exaggerated idea we have of the happiness of others.
Anon
The alarm goes off in the morning. You eat breakfast and get ready for the day. Before you walk out the door, you put on your happy face. Someone asks ‘how are you?’ and you answer ‘fine’. You’re perfect, just like everybody else.
Some people ARE happy, don’t get me wrong. The point is that they’re not living in the garden of Eden any more than you are. It’s good to imitate the things we admire in each other, as long as we don’t make the mistake of thinking they’ve got life figured out. It shouldn’t come as a shock when couples break up, people admit boredom or sneak a tearful interlude in the staff bathrooms. That’s what life is like.
This year, I’ve decided to do things a little differently. I’m leaving behind the fictions that are supposed to make me happy or that make my life seem what it’s not.
To hell with the pursuit of love … to all that flirtation needed to maintain the buoyancy of my ego. It might seem shiny when I speak of different guys expressing interest but honestly? It’s a massive energy drain that usually ends in disappointment. The flattery of beating them off with a stick is fiction. I no longer look to like. I’ll be unavailable except to the most promising of candidates. Seriously, I have better things to do.
To hell with the pursuit of the merry single life too. It might seem shiny to have all those photos up on facebook of wild nights out but honestly? It’s a late night, alcohol poisoning and poor performance for days afterward. I am defeating myself, living counter productively … and for what? The merry single life is fiction. There are better things to do and I will be in better shape to do them.
Not only do we have an exaggerated idea of the happiness of others, but also of lifestyles. They’re junk food. They fill you up and taste good in the moment but there’s no real nutrition there.
I want a life worth living.
Muchness 